I sometimes have the illusion that I can write short stories, but ultimately, readers recognize that they are, could be, or should be part of a novel or a series, a larger world than a short story. The illusion, I think comes from noel scene writing. The ideal scene is a story in itself: characters, setting, emotions, a change. A short story doesn't really require any more than that, although to be a really good scene or an adequate short story, all of those have to be really well developed. Where they differ is that the scene must carry the greater story arc of the novel, take it forward a step. I suspect that where I go wrong with short stories is that I have in mind more of the world, what came before, what will come after, and it leaks into the story even when I want it as a story rather than a scene.
Similarly, where I find myself less satisfied with my science fiction scenes than my quest fantasies, is that there are always new scene settings for the quest fantasies, whereas my space SF tend to be rather contained in a ship or two, a city or two, or as one I am working on, air-base prisons that are much the same from one to the next. That means that many scenes might share the same setting, and I don't have to, shouldn't spend as much of the scene describing that setting. Even if I include a few words and phrases to remeind the reader where they are at, add a different detail as some prop becomes more pat of the scene instead of an unspecified background element, I still end up with less richly described scenes. It's appropriate, but leaves me feeling like something is missing as I work on my revisions.
What do you look for when you revise your scenes?
Monday, December 27, 2010
Monday, December 20, 2010
alien versions of English
Okay, right off, I know the ast scene in E-ships has problems, for one, valley hillbilly doesn't really make sense, and certainly isn't the sort of phrase these people would use. On the other hand, is it something my readers will understand? Think amusing? Hillbilly has all kinds of implicatinos, mostly what I intend here, including the mountain base (though outsiders think of them as coming from the valleys, they themsleves think of themselves as living on the mountains) but are there other words that would provide the meaning without the apparent contradiction? And is the contradiction absurd, or clever? Sometimes, I just don't know.
And then there is the "witty reparte" between the two. Does it come off right? Endeavor is probably too high end a word for the hillbilly. I enjoy writing the word play and rarely have the characters who would participate. I suspect half of it is a stretch of my imagination to see a connection between the words at all, and that the other half is too blatent to seem anything but trite, but that, too, is hard to tell from the writer side of the equation. How does it come across to the reader?
And then there is the "witty reparte" between the two. Does it come off right? Endeavor is probably too high end a word for the hillbilly. I enjoy writing the word play and rarely have the characters who would participate. I suspect half of it is a stretch of my imagination to see a connection between the words at all, and that the other half is too blatent to seem anything but trite, but that, too, is hard to tell from the writer side of the equation. How does it come across to the reader?
Friday, November 12, 2010
I think I'm Back
A computer crash turned out to be more complete than originally hoped so I now have a new computer, new versions of all my old files, and access to the internet at LOOONG last. Meanwhile, Earthlink changed some of their web software so it is no longer compatible with Firefox and I can't update my story that I was presenting there. So, that one will join E-ships on this blog (in it's own category) as soon as I figure out where I was. As I generally do when I am sans computer, I wrote a lot of stuff on paper which now has to be typed and I have to re-establish my posting schedule, so it is likely to be irratic, especially with the upcoming holidays. Please bare with me as I find the most effective new pattern for getting on line, and I hope you enjoy the side order of fantasy to accompany the science fiction.
Saturday, September 4, 2010
revising notes - the other book
I may have mentioned (or may not) that I was reviewing sequels to a book I'm trying to find a agent for and found them a bit of a mess. I did some preliminary fixes, read them aloud to my sister during a recent trip - the third book is still a sorry mess with many gaps, and noted lots of minor fixes and a couple of major ones for the second book.
Following Context, I'm going through it again, the same paper version in a binder, looking for other specifics including names and descriptions (yellow highlighter) of people, places, and things, so that I can create a listing and to ensure consistency. At the same time, I am drafting small filler bits I noted as needed and deleting lots of sentences that explain the same things repeatedly or explain things that don't need explaining. I do that a lot. Some of it I know I do, especially in early drafts, as reminders to myself, so I know why i did something and don't forget and accidentally delete something will be important to a later scene if not obviously the current one, but in the final draft, they all have to go. It must be left up to the reader to figure it out (if they even notice) as a small mystery, a hint, a forshadowing, or whatever. Otherwise too much of the pleasure of continuing to read (looking for answers) is lost.
I kind of new that and watched for it during my revision, but reading silently to ones self, the repetitive bits are EASY to miss, because they are already in the mind and the second time, its not obvious whether it was in the book already or in the mind, as before. Reading it aloud creates a new memory--the memory of saying the words rather than just the content of them--so even if my audience doesn't recognize the repetition (and usually my sister catches them right away unless they are phrased and focused VERY differently)--I recognize the repetition as I say it and make a quick squiggle in the margin for later revision/deletion (the first occurence doesn't get the squiggle but may be the version that gets deleted when i decide on the revisions). i was kind of aware of the need, but was surprised how much I had done it, and also surprised how often the unneeded explanations were one-liners that I was quite fond of at the end of paragraphs. They always say "kill your darlings" but whenever I've heard it, they were refering to whole scenes that are fun but don't add to the story. in this case, my darlings are a bunch of one liner sentences. Alas. When I put it in the computer, I'll keep it all by saving as a new version and making all the changes there, so it won't be quite as painful, but one way or the other, they have to go, and so do many paragraphs of explanatory narration. Valueable for thinking the subtlties of the story through, but not for the reader.
At Context, one of the teachers who taught the value of planning the plot up front repeated often that it helped avoid writing 150,000 words when you should be aiming for 100,000 or less. But that's definitely not my problem. I'd have to write 150,000 words in order to have a hundred thousand by the time I'm done revising. And its usually the better for being shrunk once all the additions have been made. If I have a complaint about published books, its usually that they didn't get the excess edited out, especially in the later books of any series.
Following Context, I'm going through it again, the same paper version in a binder, looking for other specifics including names and descriptions (yellow highlighter) of people, places, and things, so that I can create a listing and to ensure consistency. At the same time, I am drafting small filler bits I noted as needed and deleting lots of sentences that explain the same things repeatedly or explain things that don't need explaining. I do that a lot. Some of it I know I do, especially in early drafts, as reminders to myself, so I know why i did something and don't forget and accidentally delete something will be important to a later scene if not obviously the current one, but in the final draft, they all have to go. It must be left up to the reader to figure it out (if they even notice) as a small mystery, a hint, a forshadowing, or whatever. Otherwise too much of the pleasure of continuing to read (looking for answers) is lost.
I kind of new that and watched for it during my revision, but reading silently to ones self, the repetitive bits are EASY to miss, because they are already in the mind and the second time, its not obvious whether it was in the book already or in the mind, as before. Reading it aloud creates a new memory--the memory of saying the words rather than just the content of them--so even if my audience doesn't recognize the repetition (and usually my sister catches them right away unless they are phrased and focused VERY differently)--I recognize the repetition as I say it and make a quick squiggle in the margin for later revision/deletion (the first occurence doesn't get the squiggle but may be the version that gets deleted when i decide on the revisions). i was kind of aware of the need, but was surprised how much I had done it, and also surprised how often the unneeded explanations were one-liners that I was quite fond of at the end of paragraphs. They always say "kill your darlings" but whenever I've heard it, they were refering to whole scenes that are fun but don't add to the story. in this case, my darlings are a bunch of one liner sentences. Alas. When I put it in the computer, I'll keep it all by saving as a new version and making all the changes there, so it won't be quite as painful, but one way or the other, they have to go, and so do many paragraphs of explanatory narration. Valueable for thinking the subtlties of the story through, but not for the reader.
At Context, one of the teachers who taught the value of planning the plot up front repeated often that it helped avoid writing 150,000 words when you should be aiming for 100,000 or less. But that's definitely not my problem. I'd have to write 150,000 words in order to have a hundred thousand by the time I'm done revising. And its usually the better for being shrunk once all the additions have been made. If I have a complaint about published books, its usually that they didn't get the excess edited out, especially in the later books of any series.
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