some comments on chap 8

I've rewritten the bulk of chapter 8 several times, more violent, more sexual tension, less of both, lots of different versions of the dialog.

Part of the problem is a perennial desire to be logical, when the 'logic' is full of my own biases and views and sensibilities. Of course with aliens more than in other kinds of fiction, the meanining of 'logic' will shift. The senior interrogator will have a different set of logic formulas, so I decided it made sense, followed an appropriate degree of reason, that he would be appalled at the recording or sharing of recordings of prisoner's vulnerable moments, searches, bathroom visits, but perfectly happy to conduct an invasive search in person as if that were more appropriate.

I was also tempted to use it as a forum to comment on my disapproval of the excessive airport security and the new machines that constitute a virtual strip search, overly thorough wand searches with no privacy at all, and other inappropriate behavior they call airport policy, but for the most part I refrained. At this point I hope only to leave open, perhaps encourage readers to ask themselves the question, how much is too much, and do the circumstances make a difference? All very subtly, of course.

And I want it to be entertaining. Sometimes going too far is not so much entertaining as merely vulgar and uncomfortable. A little discomfort is good, especially in a scene like this where the main character is supposed to be more than uncomfortable, leaning toward terrified and on the verge of losing control, without my using those words in the story. Discomfort means there is enough tension and specifics to cause an emotional reaction; but it doesn't necessarily take much to make the reader uncomfortable. It is always hard from the writer side, with my imagination barely captured in words, to know what is enough or too much for the reader. And of course, ideally there will be many readers, each with a different point of discomfort. If there is a formula for taking the bulk of those potential readers to the right point, I don't know it. Feedback and opinions to help me find it will always be welcome.